Kyle versus Ike
by Shadowgate
Summary: This takes place after the episode "Fatbeard" and it's how Kyle really feels.


**KYLE VERSUS IKE**

**BY SHADOWGATE**

A/N The following story takes place after "Fatbeard" and is rated 'T' for language.

Strong friendship/brotherly love but no slash

I don't own South Park. Matt Stone, Trey Parker, and Comedy Central own it.

...

Kyle screamed "Ike get your ass into my room now."

Ike knew he was grounded for a month for running away to Somalia. He also knew that for the time being he was home alone with Kyle but Kyle was not happy about having to rescue him.

In fact Kyle was very pissed off.

"Kyle my dear big brother." Ike said as he entered Kyle's room.

Kyle immediately ordered him to wipe the smirk off his face.

"How about I smack you into submission like I did Clyde?" Ike said boldly.

Kyle began to feel intense rage and said "what did you say?"

Ike just laughed then Kyle smacked him. Ike tried to hit Kyle but Kyle smacked him again.

"Let me ask you Ike did you think it was funny seeing me tied up on that plank?"

Ike started to laugh. Kyle asked again "DID YOU?"

Kyle punched Ike in the face and this time it hurt. Ike got mad and charged toward Kyle but Kyle threw him against the wall. Ike was crying and said "Goddamn it I'll hit you."

Kyle punched him again.

"Ouch" said Ike

Kyle ordered him "stand still or I'll put you over my knee and beat your ass."

Ike immediately stopped and was not only crying but shaking.

"Ike do you realize it's wrong to run away now?"

"But Kyle" Kyle cut him off.

"Goddamn it Ike I want to hear yes or no and don't give me any shit about Susan Boyle."

"I'm sorry Kyle" Ike whined

Kyle went on to lecture Ike.

"Do you realize you could have been killed by those fucking Somalian Pirates Ike?"

"I do now" said Ike wiping a tear away.

"You could have been sold into slavery by those fucking pirates and sodomized Ike do you realize just how much trouble you can get into when you listen to that fat bastard Eric Cartman?"

"I do now." Ike stated

Kyle was still fuming and had to ask again "did you think it was fucking funny seeing me on that Goddamn plank?"

Ike denied it this time but Kyle said "you laughed a minute ago" and smacked Ike across the forehead.

"Now Ike when you wrote the note to mom and dad what did you mean when you said everyone at school is an idiot?" Kyle asked

Ike said "I'm sick of Susan Boyle."

Kyle got angrier and said "I told you not to give me any of that shit about Susan motherfucking Boyle."

Kyle asked again "what did you mean by everyone at school is an idiot?"

Kyle reiterated "Am I an idiot?"

Ike answered "no"

Kyle went on "What about Principal Victoria? Is she an idiot?"

Ike said "no she's smart and fair as well."

Kyle asked "what about Counselor Mackey?"

Kyle and Ike started giggling.

"Okay he's an idiot" said Kyle.

Ike thought it was over and started to tip toe out but Kyle yelled "GET BACK HERE."

"Ike do you understand why we're all pissed off at you?" Kyle asked

Ike said "yes"

Kyle went on to say "I'm really fucking disappointed that you would run away from home. I'm also saddened that you trusted Eric Cartman of all people on the face of this earth."

Kyle began to cry.

"Ike did you know that Cartman has tried to kill me on more than one occasion?"

"No" answered Ike

Kyle took Ike into his arms and they cried together.

"Promise me you'll never ever run away again." Kyle demanded as he sobbed.

"I promise" Ike complied.

Kyle stopped crying after a few minutes in order to lecture his little brother forever more.

"If you have a problem come talk to me or Stan about it. Stan's really smart and helpful or even Kenny but don't run away and don't trust that big fat motherfucker."

"I will" Ike said as he sobbed.

"You have a month in your room to think about what you've done." Kyle stated firmly and then tucked Ike into bed.

When Kyle came out of Ike's room he saw Stan's shadow in the hallway. Turns out Stan decided to step into the bathroom after Kyle told him he had some "quick personal business" with Ike.

"Damn you really disciplined him like you said you would." Stan said

"Shh he's asleep" Kyle snapped.

Stan nodded and Kyle suddenly fell into his arms and said "you have no idea how hard it was for me to discipline my brother."

Stan held him tight and said "I thought you were going to put him over your knee and spank him."

Kyle sniffled

After two minutes of hugging the boys let up.

"Well I need to get home it's late." Stan said.

Kyle responded "Hey Stan when I hugged you I could hear your heart beating fast."

"Kyle Ike wasn't the only one you had shaking." Stan commented

"DUDE!" Kyle exclaimed

Stan said "I'll see you tomorrow."

Kyle said "no you won't because I'm going to be in juvenile hall for beating the shit out of Cartman."

Kyle showed and evil glare.

THE END


End file.
